Once we become aware of Cluster B personality disorders, and once we've been exposed to these types and their unoriginal, childlike behaviors having gained that awareness, we finally can see them for what they really are: losers. There really is just no other way to say it. The pathological envy that drives these people is part and parcel of their toxic behavior--it's usually the primary driving force--so if you become a target of these people, just remember: They're seething with envy, and their attempts to disrupt your life are aimed at making you as miserable as they are. They would love nothing more than to bring you down to their level. Don't go there. Let them mire around in the slop that is their lives with their fellow toxic buddies and flying monkeys.
So what drives their envy? Well, you represent something that they want but cannot materialize in their own lives. It may be your family life, your appearance, your career, your education, and most often--your emotional health. These people are dark, and they can't stand to see people who are genuinely happy and enjoying their lives. Because they're incredibly lazy and lack the most basic social and life skills, they aren't willing or able to focus on and improve their own lives. That would require too much energy, or perhaps they've tried in the past but couldn't pull it off because their disordered behaviors always emerge in non-toxic work settings, school settings, and social settings. They can't hold a job for longer than 1 or 2 years, and those who go the education route are typically booted from programs for antisocial behavior, or they fail when their grandiose notions of their own intellectual superiority are proven false. This frustrates and enrages them. At that point, all that's left to make them feel temporarily better is to try to snuff out the light they see in others. They hate you for having what they haven't yet and never will accomplish.
Many Cluster Bs hit a wall when they hit mid-life. The females don't garner the attention they did when they were younger. The men are faced with their own failures, relegated to dependency on their spouses, other family members, or public assistance. By middle age, any grandiose notions they held about their own abilities and future success have been proven wrong, and they're left with the reality of who and what they truly are: Losers.
Emotionally healthy people don’t harass, stalk, and smear other people. They don’t need or desire to for a very simple reason: They have lives. They have healthy, loving relationships, careers, friends, interests, all of the things that render them unwilling to waste their time on obsessing over other people because healthy people aren't interested in dragging people down; they're interested in lifting people up. The personality disordered have none of those things, so they target those who do. In short, they’re parasites, drawing sustenance from the very people they despise. Not only are they powerless against you; they’re dependent on you. Let that sink in. And remind yourself of that the next time one of these losers tries to get a reaction out of you. I promise you that you’ll come to a point where you shrug your shoulders and chuckle at their ridiculous tactics, and you’ll be shown over and over again just how pathetic they truly are.
So should we pity these people? That's a question that we all need to answer for ourselves, so I can't really say one way or the other whether you should or shouldn't. What I can say is that the answer to that question for me, without hesitation, is hell no.
Cluster Bs find themselves in a perpetual state of misery because of their own actions (and inaction). They know the difference between right and wrong. They know the difference between legal and illegal behavior. They just don't care. Our best defense? Utter and total indifference. And once you realize what complete and utter losers these people are, indifference comes pretty naturally.
Keep in mind that for all of their ranting and raving and threats, these people are powerless in all areas of their lives. They don't exercise any semblance of agency over their own lives. They sit, stagnant, in their self-fashioned toxic bubble, relying on the same old manipulation and bullying tactics they did when they were small children. Despite their delusional, grandiose sense of self, they're emotional toddlers. This is something that can be very effectively used to your advantage, should you decide to take steps to hold these people accountable.
More on that is coming soon...